the collective "SQUEE!" heard 'round the world

yeah, do your ears hurt from all the SQUEEING? mine are still ringing.


oh, shit. maybe that's because i was going BANANA-SANDWICH-FUCKING-CRAZY in my room at exactly 4:43 pm this afternoon when my twitter twin, miss shoe box, informed me that THE ROBSTEN SHIT HAS HIT THE FAN! (ok, she didn't really say that. what she did was IM me a link and instruct me, no less than five times in ALL CAPS, to "LOOK NOW! LOOK NOW! GOOOOOO!").


so i clicked. and then i died. of sheer joy. from the robsten love documented in paris today. are you ready for this? ARE. YOU. READY...?

photo from x17online.com, where you can find a shitload more pictures of this event. a shitload more than you ever need to see. one is good enough, unless you're a twicum guzzling whore like me. but in case you want more. go there.

click the photo above for BIG (and i do mean BIG). and feel free to zoom. 'cause, like miss shoe box said, "that's all kinds of noodle hands!". NOODLE HANDS. LOVEY DOVEY NOODLE HANDS! that's what those are.

excuse me, robsten haters and robsten doubters, could you please form a line "to the left, to the left", and drink your haterade together? 'cause you suck. and this is PROOF! PROOF, BABY!

*happiest-ninja-ever dance*

and i'm totes blaming the #robsten explosion for breaking my uber twitter this evening. not that i'm complaining. just sayin'.

....silence...

*FIST PUMP!*

halloween recap (better late than never *shrug*)

ok, i know, i'm way late with this. i'm slow. besides, like most of my fellow mamas, i feel like i have exactly 15 spare minutes that are truly mine in the course of any given day. and those are the 15 minutes at the end of the day; you know, the 15 mins right before before my body just decides it's had enough of being awake and i collapse and start drooling wherever i happen to be. sexy visual, right?

anyway. halloween was a blasty blast. sage, despite having been sick since weds night, wasn't running a fever anymore and was stoked about trick-or-treating, so i took him out with our neighbors for about 40 minutes. he's not really into candy -- he THINKS he is, but he usually takes one bite of the candybar or whatever it is and then declares he doesn't want it. so, while he thought getting candy was pretty cool, the most exciting part of the event was ringing doorbells. this kid is a future "ding dong ditch" champion, mark my words. BRING IT.

halloween cupcake with a 50 ft blob of neon green icing. mmmm!

after thomas the train was safely snuggled in bed, yoga ninja mama (disguised as a vampire cabaret girl) went out to play with the big kids:

fun was had by all! a few highlights:

1. "tammy from the streets" snorting a red jello shot ("tammy from the streets" = extremely intoxicated guy dressed as a female whore).

2. the staged chain saw massacre, during which i was clutching onto a friend's shirt so tightly that i nearly strangled him.

3. the hippie and the samurai fighting (which resulted in the samurai sword landing in the pool and sinking to a lonely death)

hooray for halloween! *happy ninja dance*

OME! it's halloween!

first of all, i'd like to be the first to announce that it's HOODIE SEASON in phoenix. oh wait, scratch that. it WAS hoodie season. for about four days. today, however, it's 90 degrees again. *sigh*. i'm putting my hoodie season post on the shelf until the real hoodie season makes its grand entrance *glares at mother nature*. during the sprinkling of chilly fall days we had recently, sage and i did manage to take a trip to mother nature's farm and visit their pumpkin patch.

what? don't act like you're surprised that i gawked and took a picture of the sheep with the BIGGEST BALLS ON THE PLANET. you don't see this shit every day.

next item on the agenda: HALLOWEEN! gah! it's my favorite holiday, hands. down. unfortunately, i haven't had a ton of extra time on my hands this year to get into the halloween spirit. usually i go all out with halloween crafts, a spooky movie marathon, a well thought out costume, etc. but this year? nada. i can't say that i can check any of those halloween rituals off of my list this year *sigh* *kicks self*.

the one thing i DID manage to do? get my hands on some fuckhawt volturi contacts. ahh, my twilight obsession. it bleeds into every aspect of my life. and i wouldn't have it any other way ;). i also have fangs, which will be on display at the halloween party i'm attending tonight, but here are the contacts:

happy volturi vamp

i-will-fuck-you-up volturi vamp

little bug has been sick with a fever and general flu-esque symptoms since weds night, but he's bounced back a bit today and his fever seems to have broken for the most part. so thomas the tank engine will be out trick or treating tonight, i'm happy to say. it would break my heart if he were too sick to go, as he's really been looking forward to it. photos to come, natch ;). oh and if you're in the mood for some stellar halloween music (and how could you not be? HELLO! IT'S HALLOWEEN!), do yourself a favor and make your way over to the music savvy mom blog. you can thank me later!

oh, and i've already picked out my costume for next year:

vaginaaaaa! check out more awesome vagina costumes at wtfcostumes.

ok pretty bitches, i'm off to get vamped up whilst listening to some kickass halloween music. be safe and have fun, lovelies!

the monsters of folk show: a two hour musicgasm

i'm not sure i can find the words to adequately describe how incredible this show was. my head is still in the clouds and my feet are still tapping. we were 15th row center and it was gorgeous. the orpheum theatre is a beautiful place by itself, but when conor oberst, m. ward, jim james, and mike mogis are on stage together, prepare to be mindfucked straight out of your skull.

they played a solid 2.5 hours. they played monsters of folk tunes, old/new bright eyes numbers, m. ward lovelies, and my morning jacket lullabies.

it's safe to say that throughout the entire show, my smile was so big that it was eating my face. my cheeks are sore from the constant smiling. luckily, emilie is well accustomed to the strange reactions i have when conor oberst is in close proximity. so she wasn't alarmed.

(em, i've never seen a conor/bright eyes show without you, and if i can help it, i never will. oh wait, ok, there was that one time when bright eyes played at the celebrity theatre with jesse sykes. i went alone. i think you were in indiana that night.)

anyway. since words are obviously failing me, here are a few photos:

after the show, i drove em back to her car, and we stumbled upon this masterpiece right next to modified arts. i don't know this joe pagac guy, but i'd like to give him a big wet kiss for painting this mural. when we saw it, i made loud noises from the car as we were driving by, then we parked and i dragged emilie around the corner with me to take pictures. she puts up with me, isn't she sweet? ;)



after she took this picture, i made out with the wall. after two glasses of wine and a show full of fantastic musicgasm fuckery, i just couldn't help myself *shrug*.

i have a ticket stub and photos and beautiful music in my head. now all i need is the set list. *runs away to search internet*

new kicks

hipster moms rejoice! i give you: sage's first pair of converse.

well, that's sort of a lie. his first pair were traditional chuck taylor hi tops. but that was awhile ago, and he was still in that "i'm a baby and i grow at the speed of light" phase, so he only got to wear them two or three times before they had to be retired to the box.

anyway, when i brought these bad boys home the other night, sage was beside himself with excitement. he loves them. and so do i. everyone wins.

you are the roots that sleep beneath my feet and hold the earth in place

i wrote this about two weeks ago, but stuffed it away in my 'drafts' folder. i wasn't sure about it. but i want to post it, because there are few things in my life as simple and as true as this.

***

i spent the weekend grueling (and mumbling expletives) over an essay for my lit class.

i wasn't happy about writing it. i love to write, and i thoroughly enjoy reading, but i wasn't thrilled with d.h. lawrence's "the rocking-horse winner". i only had to read it once to file it neatly away under the "boring and irrelevant" folder in my mental filing cabinet of literature that i both love and loathe.

i turned the paper in tonight. after i got home and poured myself a (big fucking) glass of spanish red wine, it hit me. all of a sudden, i felt the delicious, overwhelming weight of absolute gratitude. i don't know what spurred this web of thought. but suddenly i was very aware of the cruel reality of the mother from lawrence's story. if you haven't read the story, let me tell you about the mother, hester. hester was a woman who was blessed in many ways (the house, the kids, the husband, the hired help), but she was never satisfied, because she was entirely consumed by her obsession for more. more money, more material possessions, more social status trophies, more money, more money, more money. hester's obsession left no room in her heart for anything but her futile pursuit of obscene wealth. she could not love her children, she could not appreciate her life, and she could not feel gratitude at all. there's an eerie supernatural, perhaps evil undertone to the story, and ultimately the obsession ends up killing one of hester's children.

i suppose i read the story so many times over the weekend, in an attempt to perfect the essay (note to self: perfection is still overrated and always will be), that i missed the underlying emotion i was feeling.

tonight it hit me. i am so fucking grateful for sage's bright smile, his curious mind, and his overflowing heart. sage is my favorite person in the entire world. sometimes when i see his face light up, i have to pinch myself to remind me that he's real. and he's mine :).

it's no secret that i love bright eyes and any project that conor oberst touches ('cause whatever he does is fucking fabulous. even his poop is a smelly work of art. serious.) this is one of my favorite bright eyes songs. i can't listen to it without a few stray tears trickling down my cheeks.

sagebug, this song is yours. and so is my heart.

life in a snow globe (not as pretty as it should be)

i feel like my life is a snow globe, and someone just keeps shaking the fuck out of it.


it's a cluster fuck in here and i can't see my hand in front of my face.


holding my breath until friday, when this week comes to a close and i can finally sit down and post something of substance.

<3