Sunday, July 19, 2009

wearing assless chaps and reading jane austen

SUH-WEET JESUS. today i got an invitation (on facebook, of all places) to attend my five year highschool reunion.

this is a tough decision, since i loved high school so much. let me deliberate...oh wait, this is easier than i thought it would be. FUUUUUCK NO.

i respectfully declined the invitation. thanks for thinking of me though, class prez. you're a classy broad.

ANYWAY, after i finished my boisterous fit of laughter, i started thinking of all the things i'd rather do than attend my high school reunion. let's have a look, shall we?

things i'd rather do than attend my high school reunion

1. wear assless chaps

2. have sex with shaq (i'm pretty sure his schlong would kill me, or at least cause some serious damage)

3. have sex with the 'leave britney alone' guy

4. set myself on fire

5. eat balut (yeah. nasty.)

6. have my soul sucked out by a dementor

6. wear ugg boots with a mini skirt (or wear them at all.)

etc. etc. etc. it's a long and graphic list. *shiver*

on a completely unrelated note, i started reading jane austen's pride and prejudice yesterday. i'm about halfway through already. let me be honest, i wasn't sure i'd have an interest in reading anything other than twilight, twilight fanfic, or other vampire fiction ever EVER again. some strange miracle occurred the other night at barnes and noble (where i was drooling over rob pattinson pictures and random twilight merchandise) and i ended up walking out of the store with a jane austen novel.

i have several explanations for this: aliens. schizophrenia. hypnosis. voodoo.

even more strange, i really found myself ENJOYING pride and prejudice. i wasn't sure i would be able to get into it, since i distinctly remember hating "the classics" that were shoved down my throat in high school (jane eyre, great expectations, a farewell to arms). but i love p&p. i attribute this mostly to my favorite character in the novel: miss elizabeth bennett. she's one of the only examples of a feminist character that i can remember reading about from jane austen's era. and the only thing i really love more than vampires are feminists. true story.

i do have a confession to make though. as much as i'm enjoying p&p, the only reason i picked up the novel in the first place was because i'm itching to read the zombie version of the novel:
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: The Classic Regency Romance - Now with Ultraviolent Zombie Mayhem! (vampires, zombies...i guess i'm not venturing too far from my obsession after all...)


erpeer said...

You crack me up! 5 years already?! Where does time go...

Danielle-lee said...

I'm pretty sure I threw up in my mouth a bit when i saw the picture of the balut. Oh, gah, no!
And i only *wish* I could look good in a mini-skirt & boots (but not uggs, b/c they are ANNOYING), but I'm pretty sure it's not my style. Sigh.